My Loss is Our Win

On a night which may well go down in skittling folklore as 'The Game of a Thousand 7's (and other numbers)' the mighty Red Lion 'B' finished the regular season with a resounding 'Just about Won' at the Bulls Head, Arthingworth.

The margin of victory may have been narrow, but the game was quite literally wide open until the final plucky contestants locked Cheeses in the Grand Skittling Arena. With the game poised on a knife Block, Red Lion 'B' needed just one more leg to take the spoils. Would it be a 'Hock-Too-Far', or could the brave tail-ender bring home the proverbial Leg-Cut-of-Bacon?... with lashings of peas and gravy.

Well obviously he did, or we wouldn't have won! But it was a scrawny bit of Leg, served lukewarm, and lacking the luxury garnish of peas or gravy... or even cabbage. A 7-4 loss no less. 'Rubbish', came the cry. Groans all round. So thoroughly lacking in inspiration was his performance that Red Lion 'B' deigned to throw away a 2 leg lead, and lose the Beer Leg. Well that's a lot of legs to lose. There really is only one word for it. Absolutely Bloody Legless!

So who was this hapless young skittler? Which team member was given the simple task of an easy One-Leg win for victory, yet very nearly managed to throw the whole game away. Who was the fool? Stand up and show yourself you skittling numbskull. Heat the Tar and pluck the Goose, this man needs a jolly good seeing to....

Well.......

.......let's just say that recriminations are not our style. Retribution is a game for lesser teams. We shake hands, we eat supper, and we move on to the next thrilling encounter. Poor play will never become an issue at the Red Lion. The game is played in the spirit of fun, and a generous helping of good old fashioned bonhomie. It would be wrong to name the accused, perhaps even wrong to ever mention this sorry episode again....

Besides, at the Red Lion there's a robust and well defined system in place, designed to reward good play, and encourage better play from those who've failed to measure up to team captain Fiona 'You're Dropped Mark' Barby's exacting skittling standards. I'm sure the offender will take it like a man if and when he's 'dropped' from the team for the next match. Fiona 'You're Dropped Mark' Barby is firm but fair in her assessment of performance, and I'm sure she can be relied on to do the right thing, only dropping a player after a long hard look at the little black book of averages.

A Donkey, yesterday

Next Match: Knockout Cup (28th Sept) To be played at Catholic Club, Market Harborough... unless I've been dropped of course!